Name Lips
03-29-2010, 02:40 AM
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/36038187/ns/health-kids_and_parenting/
Bad behavior linked to poor parenting
Study: Boys lacking secure attachment most likely to act out
Poor parenting causes boys, but few girls, to be particularly prone to bad behavior, a new study suggests.
The link between early parent-child relationships and future aggressive behavior held up even when the researchers accounted for socio-economic classes.
As for why there was a gender difference, the researchers say girls might just react differently to poor parenting, holding in their feelings rather than acting out. And while some might cry genetics and overall personality of a child as the cause for the poor parent-child relationship, the study team says home environment plays a greater role. Even so, they do cut parents slack, saying it's not always their fault.
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Since the 1960s, studies linking parent-child attachment with later well-being have been tarnished, hailed and then contradicted once again. But now, an analysis of 69 studies, involving nearly 6,000 children, may have definitive evidence of a correlation between school-age misconduct and attachment style in the first years of life.
An attachment style is the way "a child seeks comfort or support when they are stressed in some way," explained lead researcher Pasco Fearon of the University of Reading in the United Kingdom.
Different kinds of attachment
Securely attached babies and toddlers cry out or become visibly upset when stressed and turn to a caregiver for comfort. They use the parent as a "secure base," a place for emotional repairs and confidence tune-ups before zooming back out to explore the world. This type of coping strategy is optimal for development, psychologists think.
The study also looked at two insecure styles of attachment. "Avoidant" kids in their second year of life hide their distress and cope solo, rather than turn to their parents for comfort. Toddlers suffering from "disorganized attachment" seem to both want, and not want, their parents. They will, for example, run toward a caregiver only to freeze before reaching him or her.
Abused and neglected children often exhibit disorganized attachment. And babies of parents that overly stress independence tend to become avoidant. But even more moderate and common ways of parenting, such as being particularly harsh or inconsistent, can give rise to insecure attachment styles, Fearon said.
Gender strongly influences how attachment style affects later behavior. While all kids are aggressive sometimes, insecurely attached boys are especially likely to kick others, disobey and be generally destructive, the study found. Girls, however, are unlikely to become brutes no matter their relationship with their parents.
"Boys challenge parents more than girls, pushing parental boundaries, which may cause parenting style to play a larger role (in a boy's upbringing)," Fearon said.
Girls turn feelings inward
It is not that girls are immune to poor parenting. They might just react differently. In general, while boys tend to act out, girls are more likely to turn feelings inward, resulting in depression, anxiety or social withdrawal — a difference we can blame on both biology and social modeling, Fearon said. The study focused on aggressive behaviors, such as hitting and yelling, rather than more subtle emotional disorders.
Poor and well-off kids were equally likely to be little hoodlums when parenting was sub-par, the study found.
Extreme poverty, however, may be a special case, Fearon said, as previous studies have shown abject poverty to be a significant risk factor for aggressive behavior.
Taken together, the findings highlight the importance of emotional provisions once basic needs have been met.
While it is possible that a baby's innate personality influences the type of attachment style he or she develops, research strongly suggests that the home environment plays the greater role, Fearon said.
"But this is not about blaming the parents," Fearon added. "There may be many reasons why parents find it difficult to provide a consistent, warm environment — and all parents have difficulty sometimes."
As a society, it may be in our best interest to support parents so that they are less distracted by other concerns and more focused on parenting, he said.
If parenting improves — even if it is well past the toddler stage — things for the child will also change for the better, Fearon said.
The study is published in the March/April issue of the journal Child Development.
OK, I know it's not Science until it's been studied and fact-checked and verified...
...but I honestly don't think a single sentence of this article seemed "surprising" to me. It all seemed like common sense. And yes sometimes a chaotic childhood isn't the fault of the parents -- they might be a military family and move a lot, or they might suffer frequent tragedies or disasters, and so forth. Lots of things can lead to inconsistency and not feeling like you have a secure "foundation." But most of the time, the parents either don't know what they're doing or don't care.
I knew a mother who was very concerned about her son acting out. He seemed unusually violent. Kicked a lot. Lots of trouble at preschool. She was the model of a concerned parent, wondering what she was doing wrong. And whenever she came over she seemed like a very good mommy, or at least, not making any more mistakes than the rest of us.
But as we got to know her better we realized how chaotic her life really was. She was desperately trying to find a solid job. Her husband was a drug addict and general loser who vanished for weeks at a time. Her house was, for lack of a better word, a disaster. I'm talking strata of garbage and mess. Old food lying around rotting under layers of toys and papers and trash and books and clothes and gods know what else. She went through a messy divorce where the husband/dad kept stopping by at random times, making promises to the kids, and vanishing again. She kept refusing to cut him out of her life because occasionally he gave her money and she was desperate. We tried a few times to help her... Emerald and I even let her live with us for a few weeks while she was sorting things out (it's amazing -- and terrifying -- how soon the room we gave her turned into a microcosm of her house). She eventually moved to Illinois for some reason and we lost contact.
But you'd never know from meeting her that her life was a mess. She was intelligent and quirky, always dressed nicely (in fact she was something of a hottie), and her kids were usually as clean and neat as small kids can reasonably be expected to be. But you would know by looking at her son's behavior. I am a passive person, and her and her son remain the only people I have kicked out of my house in an absolute fury because of how violent he was getting towards the other children.
She was one of those people you'd not want to talk badly about because she's so nice in person... but so utterly lousy at raising her kids or organizing her life or making good long-term decisions. I'm sure most of you know a person like that...
Bad behavior linked to poor parenting
Study: Boys lacking secure attachment most likely to act out
Poor parenting causes boys, but few girls, to be particularly prone to bad behavior, a new study suggests.
The link between early parent-child relationships and future aggressive behavior held up even when the researchers accounted for socio-economic classes.
As for why there was a gender difference, the researchers say girls might just react differently to poor parenting, holding in their feelings rather than acting out. And while some might cry genetics and overall personality of a child as the cause for the poor parent-child relationship, the study team says home environment plays a greater role. Even so, they do cut parents slack, saying it's not always their fault.
Story continues below ↓advertisement | your ad here
Since the 1960s, studies linking parent-child attachment with later well-being have been tarnished, hailed and then contradicted once again. But now, an analysis of 69 studies, involving nearly 6,000 children, may have definitive evidence of a correlation between school-age misconduct and attachment style in the first years of life.
An attachment style is the way "a child seeks comfort or support when they are stressed in some way," explained lead researcher Pasco Fearon of the University of Reading in the United Kingdom.
Different kinds of attachment
Securely attached babies and toddlers cry out or become visibly upset when stressed and turn to a caregiver for comfort. They use the parent as a "secure base," a place for emotional repairs and confidence tune-ups before zooming back out to explore the world. This type of coping strategy is optimal for development, psychologists think.
The study also looked at two insecure styles of attachment. "Avoidant" kids in their second year of life hide their distress and cope solo, rather than turn to their parents for comfort. Toddlers suffering from "disorganized attachment" seem to both want, and not want, their parents. They will, for example, run toward a caregiver only to freeze before reaching him or her.
Abused and neglected children often exhibit disorganized attachment. And babies of parents that overly stress independence tend to become avoidant. But even more moderate and common ways of parenting, such as being particularly harsh or inconsistent, can give rise to insecure attachment styles, Fearon said.
Gender strongly influences how attachment style affects later behavior. While all kids are aggressive sometimes, insecurely attached boys are especially likely to kick others, disobey and be generally destructive, the study found. Girls, however, are unlikely to become brutes no matter their relationship with their parents.
"Boys challenge parents more than girls, pushing parental boundaries, which may cause parenting style to play a larger role (in a boy's upbringing)," Fearon said.
Girls turn feelings inward
It is not that girls are immune to poor parenting. They might just react differently. In general, while boys tend to act out, girls are more likely to turn feelings inward, resulting in depression, anxiety or social withdrawal — a difference we can blame on both biology and social modeling, Fearon said. The study focused on aggressive behaviors, such as hitting and yelling, rather than more subtle emotional disorders.
Poor and well-off kids were equally likely to be little hoodlums when parenting was sub-par, the study found.
Extreme poverty, however, may be a special case, Fearon said, as previous studies have shown abject poverty to be a significant risk factor for aggressive behavior.
Taken together, the findings highlight the importance of emotional provisions once basic needs have been met.
While it is possible that a baby's innate personality influences the type of attachment style he or she develops, research strongly suggests that the home environment plays the greater role, Fearon said.
"But this is not about blaming the parents," Fearon added. "There may be many reasons why parents find it difficult to provide a consistent, warm environment — and all parents have difficulty sometimes."
As a society, it may be in our best interest to support parents so that they are less distracted by other concerns and more focused on parenting, he said.
If parenting improves — even if it is well past the toddler stage — things for the child will also change for the better, Fearon said.
The study is published in the March/April issue of the journal Child Development.
OK, I know it's not Science until it's been studied and fact-checked and verified...
...but I honestly don't think a single sentence of this article seemed "surprising" to me. It all seemed like common sense. And yes sometimes a chaotic childhood isn't the fault of the parents -- they might be a military family and move a lot, or they might suffer frequent tragedies or disasters, and so forth. Lots of things can lead to inconsistency and not feeling like you have a secure "foundation." But most of the time, the parents either don't know what they're doing or don't care.
I knew a mother who was very concerned about her son acting out. He seemed unusually violent. Kicked a lot. Lots of trouble at preschool. She was the model of a concerned parent, wondering what she was doing wrong. And whenever she came over she seemed like a very good mommy, or at least, not making any more mistakes than the rest of us.
But as we got to know her better we realized how chaotic her life really was. She was desperately trying to find a solid job. Her husband was a drug addict and general loser who vanished for weeks at a time. Her house was, for lack of a better word, a disaster. I'm talking strata of garbage and mess. Old food lying around rotting under layers of toys and papers and trash and books and clothes and gods know what else. She went through a messy divorce where the husband/dad kept stopping by at random times, making promises to the kids, and vanishing again. She kept refusing to cut him out of her life because occasionally he gave her money and she was desperate. We tried a few times to help her... Emerald and I even let her live with us for a few weeks while she was sorting things out (it's amazing -- and terrifying -- how soon the room we gave her turned into a microcosm of her house). She eventually moved to Illinois for some reason and we lost contact.
But you'd never know from meeting her that her life was a mess. She was intelligent and quirky, always dressed nicely (in fact she was something of a hottie), and her kids were usually as clean and neat as small kids can reasonably be expected to be. But you would know by looking at her son's behavior. I am a passive person, and her and her son remain the only people I have kicked out of my house in an absolute fury because of how violent he was getting towards the other children.
She was one of those people you'd not want to talk badly about because she's so nice in person... but so utterly lousy at raising her kids or organizing her life or making good long-term decisions. I'm sure most of you know a person like that...