Most fucked up thing requested?

[Limper]

What is the most strange thing any of your partners have ever requested?

Long ago back in early college I was at the dorm room of this chick and things progressed from study to sex (thank you Jim Beam). She's on top and we're both having a blast when she reaches into her nightstand pulls out a carrot presses it into my hand and begs me to stick the carrot in her ass.

Now over all thats pretty tame but at the time it was not only strange but it made me laugh so hard that it ruined the moment for her... and got me thrown out of her room... and shunned for the remainder of the year.

[Keeper of Secrets]

What is the most strange thing any of your partners have ever requested?

Long ago back in early college I was at the dorm room of this chick and things progressed from study to sex (thank you Jim Beam). She's on top and we're both having a blast when she reaches into her nightstand pulls out a carrot presses it into my hand and begs me to stick the carrot in her ass.

Now over all thats pretty tame but at the time it was not only strange but it made me laugh so hard that it ruined the moment for her... and got me thrown out of her room... and shunned for the remainder of the year.

I have had some requests that I found distrubing but may not be strange by the standards of people here. Beatings, humiliations and cartoon character voices. (I can do impersonations and voices rather well.)

[Limper]

I have had some requests that I found distrubing but may not be strange by the standards of people here. Beatings, humiliations and cartoon character voices. (I can do impersonations and voices rather well.)

So she begged you to talk dirty to her in the voice of Bullwinkle?

[Keeper of Secrets]

So she begged you to talk dirty to her in the voice of Bullwinkle?

Just about . . .

Oh I forgot my comedy option:

I was once asked to fuck her ugly. So I put on my Limper mask.

[Brynja]

This brings me back to Lovejoy.

If any of you remember the Lovejoy Chronicles- you may recall this. I don't remember if I included this tid bit.

So thanks to the power of P-Funk, retarded amounts of screech (thank you lower drinking age Canada), and hormones I find myself in bed with Lovejoy.

Now the weird request was the following: After trying to have sex with me and before yaking he says "Look can you shave my chest"

I looked at him- and since I am at that point operating without any mental filter I told him exactly what I thought of that idea.

Needless to say this event is only memorable because of the trainwreck it was.

[Limper]

Some guy at a bar once asked if he could lick my boot.

I didn't say shit I just looked at him like he had an extra chromasome until he walked away.

[Brynja]

I didn't know you went to gay bars.

[Limper]

I didn't know you went to gay bars.

I didn't. Normal dance club sorta bar.

Guess I boot was so sexy he couldn't resist.

[Brynja]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ipZDG6__Zfc

[Limper]

I bought that CD way back when since the hostility it caused in folks was priceless.

Put it on your stereo... put that song on continuous replay... lock your door... leave for weekend.

[Janos]

I had an ex that admitted to me that she would masturbate with a carrot when she still lived at home with her parents before she could get a toy of her own. That didn't disturb me much. It disturbed me a LOT when I realized that she'd get the carrots and 'hide' them in her hampster cage as a snack for the guy, then pull them out later that night to use as toys.

[Limper]

I had an ex that admitted to me that she would masturbate with a carrot when she still lived at home with her parents before she could get a toy of her own. That didn't disturb me much. It disturbed me a LOT when I realized that she'd get the carrots and 'hide' them in her hampster cage as a snack for the guy, then pull them out later that night to use as toys.

Thats like training them to be savage little invasive killers or something.

[Space Cadet B^3]

That's scriptworthy!

[Limper]

That's scriptworthy!

A sequal to Willard and Ben.

[Brynja]

Free willy?

[Enk]

She asked for an intricate age-play scenario involving discipline happy stewardesses.

I'm not kidding.

[Keeper of Secrets]

She asked for an intricate age-play scenario involving discipline happy stewardesses.

I'm not kidding.

Enk, what the fuck is 'intricate age-play?'

[Ancalagon]

I can't really think of anything that shocking...

This either means that I'm unfazed by most requests, or that I'm the one making the weird requests...

Probably a mixture of both :P

[Glass]

Yeah, I'm not sure what really qualifies as fucked up for me anymore. Maybe a year or two ago, but I'm too far down the rabbit hole now. :D

Year and a half ago, though, when the opera singer asked me to backhand her hard in the face, though, that was pretty off-putting.

Oh, I did have that one girl ask me to spit on her asshole and then fuck her in the ass. That was kind of strange.

And Jenn insisting on calling me "Daddy" during sex was also kinda weird, given what I knew about her family issues.

Damn, maybe some things are a little weird for me.

[FeatsofClay]

Year and a half ago, though, when the opera singer asked me to backhand her hard in the face, though, that was pretty off-putting.

I have had this one a lot.

Not Opera singers but women who wanted to be treated exceptionally roughly. I think there is something about me that attracts that type.

[Glass]

I have had this one a lot.

Not Opera singers but women who wanted to be treated exceptionally roughly. I think there is something about me that attracts that type.
I don't mind some rough treatment, really, but causing lasting harm just isn't something I'm into. Spanking, flogging, hell, I'll bust out the evil stick and even joke about spanking my girlfriend with a curtain rod, but hitting someone in the face hard enough to leave a bruise is a no-no for me.

You attract the crazies too? *not alone*

[Freedom Canadian]

Enk, what the fuck is 'intricate age-play?'

First, you tie up the "receiver" to a chair or something similar using number 4 vietnamese knots. Then you hire an old dude which you put, upside down, into a tight harness that hangs from a rope tied (double check that knot - security first, people !) to a hook securely fastened to a support beam in the ceiling.

Then you gently flog the "receiver" by swinging the old dude at them slowly, in 8-patterns. You can also rotate the aged person slightly to vary sensations.

Glad I could help. :)

[Keeper of Secrets]

First, you tie up the "receiver" to a chair or something similar using number 4 vietnamese knots. Then you hire an old dude which you put, upside down, into a tight harness that hangs from a rope tied (double check that knot - security first, people !) to a hook securely fastened to a support beam in the ceiling.

Then you gently flog the "receiver" by swinging the old dude at them slowly, in 8-patterns. You can also rotate the aged person slightly to vary sensations.

Glad I could help. :)

Any sexual antics that involve me getting to swing an old man at someone is OK by me.

[Freedom Canadian]

Any sexual antics that involve me getting to swing an old man at someone is OK by me.

Remember, if the old man says the safe word, you have to untie him.

Some people use gags, but that's just cruel.

[Dr. Cherry Gunn]

I know you probably won't believe me, but one time a girl wanted to do it in a position other than missionary. Haha, I know, you think I'm joking, but I'm not. It was gross.

[Keeper of Secrets]

I know you probably won't believe me, but one time a girl wanted to do it in a position other than missionary. Haha, I know, you think I'm joking, but I'm not. It was gross.


Are you talking about her pooper or yours?

[Kyllikki]

Recently a drunk guy wanted to seduce "a friend of mine" using a paper hat as a prop....... ;)

Seriously, i've never been hit with anything that turned me off; nobody really has gotten close to my limits. Of course, no one has asked for carrots or water sports or scat play or anything like that yet.

No, one ex of mine liked to tie me down and use temporary tattoo ink to tattoo me. They took about a month to fade each time. But that was hot so i can't really call it "weird."

I got nothin'.

[shabois]

I am very certain my sex life is tame compared to my fellow posters, but the weirdest thing for me was in college a girl wanted to have a 3-way with my roommate and I. While nothing ground breaking, when your a young hetro guy in college this is one of the last things you want to hear and made the whole scene uncomfortable.... until we went to the bar and got drunk!;)

[Keeper of Secrets]

I am very certain my sex life is tame compared to my fellow posters, but the weirdest thing for me was in college a girl wanted to have a 3-way with my roommate and I. While nothing ground breaking, when your a young hetro guy in college this is one of the last things you want to hear and made the whole scene uncomfortable.... until we went to the bar and got drunk!;)


I may have told you this before but three ways are logistical nightmares. Even one of the freakiest girls I ever knew agreed to the idea that there seems to be someone 'always makin' sandwiches.'

[Ancalagon]

ha, I had forgotten about that one... I turned down a MFM threesome offer last year, I just wasn't comfortable with the situation. I guess things would be easier for me if I was bi, but well, I'm not.

[shabois]

I may have told you this before but three ways are logistical nightmares. Even one of the freakiest girls I ever knew agreed to the idea that there seems to be someone 'always makin' sandwiches.'

This could be its own thread! I agree completely! We have had this discussion in the past and I think 3 ways only work with you and 2 escorts with the meter running then there are no complicatons.

Otherwise it can lead to a big shit storm...

[Keeper of Secrets]

This could be its own thread! I agree completely! We have had this discussion in the past and I think 3 ways only work with you and 2 escorts with the meter running then there are no complicatons.

Otherwise it can lead to a big shit storm...


What do you know about running meters?

[shabois]

If on the meter make sure you go the direct route and don't get the run around on some detour...:D

[Varaj]

Nothing freaky been asked of me, but I'm pretty hard to freak. :)


Oh and never had a problem with threesomes, been doing them since I was teen. Just about every combination you can picture.

[Droid101]

Nothing freaky been asked of me, but I'm pretty hard to freak. :)


Oh and never had a problem with threesomes, been doing them since I was teen. Just about every combination you can picture.

*pictures a goat and a chicken with come hither looks on their faces*

[Varaj]

*pictures a goat and a chicken with come hither looks on their faces*

Don't knock it until you've tried. Goats can fuck!

[FeatsofClay]

Don't knock it until you've tried. Goats can fuck!

Dude, how do you get past those funky pupils?


I had to use a mask.

[Droid101]

Don't knock it until you've tried. Goats can fuck!

*come hither look*

[Varaj]

Dude, how do you get past those funky pupils?


I had to use a mask.

I just pretended it was a llama.

[FeatsofClay]

I just pretended it was a llama.

DUDE! Fucked up puils again!

Now I see your kink, bitch. (Goes to buy funky pupil contacts)

[Varaj]

DUDE! Fucked up puils again!

Now I see your kink, bitch. (Goes to buy funky pupil contacts)

For you baby I don't need the pupils. ;)

[FeatsofClay]

For you baby I don't need the pupils. ;)

Does this mean you won't be acting as a teacher? Cause I have a cute little schoolboy outfit.

[Varaj]

Does this mean you won't be acting as a teacher? Cause I have a cute little schoolboy outfit.

Depends can you sing any AC/DC?

[FeatsofClay]

Depends can you sing any AC/DC?


I got sexy so far Angus Young it ain't even funny.

But he plays lead far better than I.

[Tetsubo]

Don't knock it until you've tried. Goats can fuck!

"I don't fuck goats, I make love to them."

Anyone get the reference?

[Tetsubo]

The oddest for me was a request for a Golden Shower. What surprised me was how difficult it was to pull off. Hard to pee with an erection...

[Cat of Ulthar]

The weirdest thing ever done to me was this guy who sucked the snot out of my nose when I was having a cold (ew). Put me off completely.
Pee in someone's mouth, and recieve it the other way around, too, but that was at the time not very strange because we were so madly in love we had decided we would do everything sexual imaginable because it would be heavenly anyway.
And pee on the guy's dick because it feels so nice, apparently. I only agreed to do that in the actual shower.

[BOZ]

The oddest for me was a request for a Golden Shower. What surprised me was how difficult it was to pull off. Hard to pee with an erection...

you should compare notes with Dmmagic. ;)