What is best in life?!?

[Ancalagon]

Conan would approve!

http://www.warrenellis.com/?p=5061

;)

[Priss]

The best things in life are free.

[Northcott]

Background info: My wife and I play softball in a "beer league" -- recreational ball that very few people take too seriously. I've only been playing ball for a couple years, so I'm no great shakes at it. I have, however, discovered that I swing lighter bats too fast, so I bought my own: a 38 oz bat. For those who don't know softball bats, most players are surprised that bats that heavy are manufactured. Most fall in the 24-28 oz range, with a rare 30-32 being considered 'heavy'.

To add to the picture, I've got this little ritual when I get up to bat where I tap the plate twice with the tip of the bat before I get into the swinging stance. My wife tells me that I look like I'm trying to intimidate the pitcher and/or thinking about killing him. I think she exaggerates.

Anyway: all that so that this makes more sense. During one of the last games of the season, one of my gamer-geek buddies comes out to the game. I step up to bat, tap the plate, eye the pitcher, and hear from behind me: "Conan! What is best in life?" The half of the team that understood started laughing. The bastard.


Edit: Thankfully, no sledgehammers were involved.

[Freedom Canadian]

38 oz ?

What is it made of, cement ?

[Ancalagon]

38 oz ?

What is it made of, cement ?

Now I'm envisioning a cinderblock on a stick

Or you know how some people put cork in their bats? Nortcott puts lead.

[Northcott]

38 oz ?

What is it made of, cement ?

Don't know, don't care. :) Once I found out that the Easton Hammer came in 36 oz, and the DeBeers New Yorker came in a 38, I knew I had to have 'em. My technique's sloppy, but when I clean up my hitting and put my hips into the swing, I can make that ball whistle when it zips past people. :D

[Kwalish Kid]

The best things in life are free.
But you can keep them for the birds and bees.
Just give me money.
That's what I want.

[Varaj]

To crush your enemies
To see them driven before you
To hear the lamination* of their woman


*Yes I spelled it like that on purpose. It never fails to make me giggle.

[Dacke]

Hot water, good dentishtry, and shoft lavatory paper.

[Brynja]

That picture is so fucking retarded

[Ancalagon]

That picture is so fucking retarded

you got to love those russians!

[Priss]

Then why do they keep charging me for the slavegirls and truckload of chocolate?

For the money, duh!

[Northcott]

That picture is so fucking retarded

You know he's going to use that to get laid. Dude's got bragging rights. His cock can split stone.

[Brynja]

Women would want to sleep with someone that dumb?

[Limper]

Women would want to sleep with someone that dumb?

Keanau Reeves gets laid.

[Northcott]

Women would want to sleep with someone that dumb?

Work in a bar for a couple years. It'll reinforce just how stupid the human race really is. I've bashed on people for perpetuating stereotypes: men are shallow pigs interested in only one thing, women are dysfunctional and only attracted to jerks, etc. But that's only because there's a minority of people who break stereotype. There are a vast number of lazy, stupid, shallow people who willingly buy into even the most transparent lie they're told so long as it makes them more comfortable: the economy is fine, global warming is a myth, I'll still respect you in the morning, etc.

The number of abysmally stupid men, acting like pigs with only one thing on their mind, who can get laid at the drop of a hat, because there are a number of dysfunctional women who are attracted to jerks, is frightening.


Hello. My name is Ed Northcott, and I'm a misanthrope.

[Brynja]

I am intrigued by your views and wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

[Janos]

Women would want to sleep with someone that dumb?

Come visit the bars around Camp Pendelton. I've seen things almost as stupid, and I've seen the very attractive women who go home with the Marines.

[doc]

The best things in life are puppies, hot redheads and cold beer

Then why do they keep charging me for the slavegirls and truckload of chocolate? Chocolate covered slavegirls ????

Women would want to sleep with someone that dumb? Well men go fo dumb women too, personally I perfer a woman I can have a intelligent conversation with about the Karma Sutra worlds problems.

Come visit the bars around Camp Pendelton. I've seen things almost as stupid, and I've seen the very attractive women who go home with the Marines. Women love a guy in uniform.